Friendship Friction

READ: PSALM 25:16-17; 1 SAMUEL 18:1-4; 20:1-42; JOHN 15:13-15

When I was sixteen, it felt like my world was crumbling. My best friend had a boyfriend, spent all her time dancing for a prestigious ballet company, and excelled at math and science. Meanwhile, I was lonely, struggling to improve at my hobbies, and hated math and science with a burning passion. What I thought would be a lifelong friendship was fizzling at the first hint of conflict.

When we experience difficulties in our relationships, we have two paths we can take. We can act out of the anger, hurt, and jealousy that derives from comparison, or we can be vulnerable and admit our feelings to our friends and overcome the tension together.

In the Bible, David had complicated relationships with King Saul and his son, Jonathan. King Saul viewed David as his enemy because he knew God wanted David to be king instead of him. He went as far as trying to kill David because of his jealousy! Meanwhile, Jonathan had every reason to dislike David. Jonathan was next in line for the throne, yet David was promised Jonathan’s future. However, Jonathan loved God and had faith in God’s promise. He cared deeply about David and encouraged him to accept his calling from God. Jonathan was a true friend.

As we grow older, our relationships will either grow with us or fade away. Not all friendships are meant to last forever, but the ones built on godly love are the most important ones to fight for in the face of conflict. With time, and many tears, my friend and I realized we needed to give each other space to grow separately before restarting our friendship with more reasonable expectations and renewed trust.

Experiencing changes in our friendships can be tiring and lonely. But Jesus wants us to call out to Him and lean on Him through this difficult process. Jesus is the best friend we could ever have. His love for us is so great, He was willing to pay the ultimate price for our friendship. He died and rose again so we can be with Him forever—both now through the Holy Spirit, and for all eternity when He returns. As you rely on Jesus, He will give you the strength and discernment you need to pursue godly friendships with courage. • Hannah Chung

• Are you struggling with comparison in any of your relationships? Consider taking a moment to talk to God about this and ask Him to remind you of His great love for you.

• Do you feel alone? Consider asking God to help you notice people who could become godly companions. Remember, even when you feel lonely, Jesus is with you. You are never truly alone.

A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need. Proverbs 17:17 (NLT)