Loved

READ: EPHESIANS 2:4-9; 3:12-21

One of the things that bothered me about God while I was growing up was that I thought He just loved me because He had to. I learned that God loved the whole world (John 3:16), but I didn’t think He really loved me personally. I thought He just loved me because I was part of “the world.” And honestly, I thought the main reason God saved me was so that He could save other people through me.

Thankfully, God has been slowly breaking down this lie that says He doesn’t really love me for me. Over the years, He has provided different mentors who I’ve been able to honestly share my struggles with. Through these people loving me, praying with me, and pointing me to Scripture, I’ve learned that I can share my struggles—including all the messy questions and anger and shame and sorrow—with Jesus. And I’ve discovered that He really does love me. He’d love me even if I was in a permanent coma and couldn’t do one single thing for Him. He saved me, not because He wants me to do anything for Him, but because He delights in me and longs for me to be with Him.

So now, when I look at the cross, I see Jesus’s love for me. He wanted to be with me so badly that the cross was worth it to Him. And through His resurrection, He frees me from every lie of the devil that accuses God of not being loving, and accuses me of not being lovable. It’s getting easier to spot these lies, and to know that they’re not true. But even when they feel true, I can bring them to Jesus and ask Him to remind me, or perhaps show me in a new way, that His love for me really is better than I could hope.

Sometimes I can do this on my own, other times I need a Christian friend or mentor to remind me of Jesus’s promises and to pray with me and help me process what I’m feeling, thinking, and maybe even believing. But every time, Jesus meets me with tender compassion, life-giving truth, and—always—love. • Hannah Howe

• When do you struggle to believe that God loves you for you? Consider spending some time in prayer, asking God to help you know His love for you in a deeper way. (Ephesians 3:14-21)

• Who are trusted Christians in your life you can be honest with about your struggles—people who will listen well, pray with you, and point you to Scriptures where Jesus promises to love you, forgive you, give you grace, and always keep you and be with you?

He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me. Psalm 18:19 (NIV)