The Path to Friendship

READ: MATTHEW 20:25-27; LUKE 10:1-9; PHILIPPIANS 2:3-8

Have you ever tried to be impressive to gain friends? Sometimes we operate under the mistaken belief that being stronger, smarter, or funnier than those around us will draw others to us. In reality, positioning ourselves above others often creates space between us and them—Jesus cautions His disciples against doing this. After all, healthy relationships are foundational to the kingdom He is building. Faith comes from hearing the message, and no one wants to listen to someone who is constantly signaling I’m better than you through their attitudes and actions.

Often the opposite is the true path to friendship: vulnerability. When we know someone else makes mistakes and struggles just like we do, we can relax about our own flaws and relate to them more fully. Vulnerability isn’t self-deprecation or unloading all our negative experiences and feelings onto others, but it does mean letting people see us as we really are—and sometimes, this includes sharing the dark or difficult areas of our lives. It also means accepting help rather than pretending to have it all together.

Jesus doesn’t have flaws or transgressions like we do—He’s sinless—yet He can truly empathize with all our hurts and temptations (Hebrews 4:14-16). And Jesus modeled healthy, relatable vulnerability throughout the Gospels (the books of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John): when He was tired, He fell asleep; when He was grieved, He wept; when He was distressed, He asked His close friends to keep watch and pray with Him; when He was hungry, He ate; and when He ministered, He accepted financial support. Jesus even sent His disciples out to meet people without taking supplies or resources that would make them self-sufficient. He told them to stay in people’s homes and eat the food they were offered, giving them time to get to know their hosts as they shared their faith and their own need for Jesus. We can do the same, walking in humility and kindness toward the people we meet, opening our true lives and selves to one another as we point toward God’s unflinching love for us. • Amber Vanderhoof

• Can you think of a time when you were vulnerable with someone who made you feel loved and welcomed? What did they say or do that made you feel this way?

• Can you think of a time when a friend challenged you to grow in your walk with Jesus, and you accepted that challenge? What about your relationship with that person made you willing to accept their advice and guidance?

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus… Philippians 2:5 (NIV)